


Not Always the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

by pidgethepidgeon



Series: Beetlejuice Short Stories [13]
Category: Beetlejuice - Perfect/Brown & King
Genre: Angst, Christmas Angst, F/F, Fluffy but Sad, Lydia is a spunky little lesbian, Lydia misses her mom, Multicultrual home, Sad with a Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:55:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21965299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pidgethepidgeon/pseuds/pidgethepidgeon
Summary: Lydia is celebrating her first Christmas without her mother.
Relationships: Lydia X Wendy - Relationship
Series: Beetlejuice Short Stories [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1556005
Comments: 10
Kudos: 62





	Not Always the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Lydia had never been one of those people that were obsessed with Christmas and the Christman season. She didn’t dislike the holiday by any means, but it wasn’t her favorite, nobody in her family got super into it besides her uber-religious grandparents. Her mom and dad would take her to church on Christmas eve with the rest of the extended family but the rest of the holiday with filled with littler traditions they came up with as a family. As Lydia got older she learned that her mom didn’t have the most loving and affectionate family growing up and that’s why she tried to hard to get everything right for Lydia. She would make her own traditions and set her own standards, she was creating a family that not only supported Lydia growing up but made up for the crappy childhood Emily had. The Santa lie was quickly dropped when a seven-year-old Lydia displayed disgust at the prospect of this strange man with questionable business ethics sneaking into her house in the middle of the night, but the family still had their own unique way of making the holiday special. 

Emily died in the middle of December the previous year, she had been sick for almost two years by that point and her body couldn’t fight anymore. She slipped away on the eighteenth of December and everything had been such a blur of emotions and funeral preparations and a parade of semi sympathetic family members that Christmas was thrown to the wayside. Charles still tried to get a smile out of his broken-hearted daughter but the feeble attempts to recreate the old traditions did nothing but further upset Lydia who spent the day locked in her room sobbing as she stared at photographs and in the mirror at her newly short and black hair wondering if she was even worthy enough to look like her mother. Though that day was technically her first Christmas without her mom it had been such a blur that she hadn’t even had time to process the loss. As the days grew closer this year it started to dawn on her that she would never run downstairs again to find her parents sitting down on the couch in their living room in front of their chaotically decorated tree, she’d never see her mom bury her face in her mug when Lydia went to open the present that her parents said she wouldn’t be getting, she’d never spend another Christmas morning having a gingerbread house decorating contest, she’d never have another Christmas eve where her parents would still have her leave out milk and cookies for Santa even though Lydia was much too old for Santa. Sure she had lots to distract her from her all-consuming thoughts with everyone in the house and celebrating Hanukkah with Wendy, but nothing could change the fact that on Christmas Eve Lydia was sitting alone on her bed, clutching a photograph from many Christmas’s ago in her shaking hands, unsure if she wanted to cry, scream, or throw the picture frame at the wall and watch the glass shatter around on the floor. 

The whole month had been an emotional rollercoaster for her bouncing from having a panic attack at school, to the isolating loneliness that came with the anniversary of Emily’s death, to the heartwarming celebration of a new culture when she spent the first night of Hanukkah with Wendy and her family, and now the numbness she was overwhelmed with now. It was a strange sensation to be overwhelmed with numbness, it somehow both felt like everything and nothing at all. Filled with so many conflicting emotions that they all canceled each other out, leaving her feeling empty inside. There were so many other months that had less going on, Lydia couldn’t help but feel as though she was being punished with her mother’s death occurring right before Christmas. She knew that was a stupid thing to be annoyed by but now every single Christmas or Hanukkah from this point forward would always compete with the sadness Lydia felt when she thought about the loss of her mother. December Eighteenth. Every holiday would feel as though it was missing something, no matter how many people she added, no matter the friends she made or the family she found. Nothing would replace the hole where Emily Deetz once existed. 

Though her therapist told her that keeping all these feelings boxed up inside of her was not good for her mental health she didn’t want to ruin anyone else’s holiday. The Maitland’s seemed so excited to have people to buy presents for, Delia was big into decorating, and though he was never crazy about it when she was little even her dad was getting into the Christmas spirit, making Lydia groan whenever he would kiss Delia underneath the mistletoe. The only person Lydia could pretend the holiday didn’t exist with was Beetlejuice, but now even with the day getting closer, he was constantly asking Lydia questions about Christmas. They were often stupid and funny questions so they were a welcome distraction but tonight she was alone. Everyone was sleeping or pretending to sleep in the Maitland’s case. She knew they were just upstairs in the attic and she could spend the night with them is she wanted to, but she couldn’t bring herself to get up. Even her cats noticed the difference in her demeanor, the usually distant Kraken was snuggled up with her on one side, and the always cuddly Cation on the other. 

The clock on her dresser glowed midnight, and though she was exhausted she slid out of bed and went back over to the pile of presents she had accumulated in her room for all the family members. She remembered how happy she was at the beginning of the month, spending hours online and out shopping with Wendy trying to find the perfect presents for the wonderful people she got to call her family. She didn’t make a ton of money babysitting Skye but she wanted to splurge on them, they had done so much for her in the past few months, she wanted to let them know how much she appreciated it. She ran her fingers on the nicely curled bows and perfectly wrapped gifts knowing that she had to admit defeat and ask Barbara and Delia for help. It worked out really well because she didn’t want them to know what she got them so she just had the other person wrap it. One present she wrapped for herself though, and she debated on if she was going to put it under the tree. Her mother couldn’t open it anyway, she wasn’t exactly sure why she spent her money on it but she couldn’t get rid of this nagging feeling in her heart until she had a gift for Emily. She told her therapist how stupid it made her feel, and while she knew her family wouldn’t tease her for it she still worried they would think the same thing she was. It was dumb, she was dumb for doing it, she...she shook her head and went back to her bed just wishing the holiday was over already and she could move on with her life. 

She eventually passed out around two in the morning and woke up around ten in the morning. Christmas morning was a lot more casual now that Lydia was older, no more running downstairs at seven in the morning to see if Santa had come, it was now whenever Lydia rolled out of bed. She stood in the mirror ruffling her hair, noting that her blonde roots were starting to show and she was going to have to decide if she was going to go back to being blonde or dye her hair again. She straightened out her fuzzy pajamas and carried the armload of presents down the stairs to find the whole family hanging around the living room, Delia, her dad, and the Maitland’s talking about dinner that night and making sure there were kosher options for Wendy, though she wasn’t super strict about it. Beetlejuice was nursing some eggnog and glaring at her cat. While she was staring at her family, they hadn’t yet noticed she was standing behind them, Lydia decided that she wasn’t going to completely ruin her holiday by lamenting over things she couldn’t change. No matter how hard she wished it, nothing would change the family that the holidays would never have her mother in them again. Blinking away a tear in her eye she greeted everyone warmly and joined them around the Christmas tree.

“Merry Christmas Lydia!” Barbara wrapped her in a warm hug, Barbara was practically bouncing up and down in excitement to give Lydia her present. Charles grumbled a little teasingly because he also wanted to give Lydia her present, but knowing Barbara he let her go first. Lydia tore through the cat pattern wrapping paper and revealed a beautiful hand-painted portrait of her two cats. She couldn’t hold back a grin and she threw herself into a tight hug with the ghost profusely thanking her and how much she loved it. She got everything right from Cation’s grey and green eyes to Kraken’s cheeky smile. While it wasn’t a contest she didn’t know if anything could quite beat that, and it seemed like Barbara knew it because she was beaming. 

Next, her father handed her a small package, and a larger package all wrapped in spare silver paper that Lydia had used for Wendy’s Hanukkah present, he smiled when handing it to her and said, “Open the small one first, I wasn’t sure if it’s your style but I hope you like it.”

Lydia carefully ripped the wrapping and opened the jewelry box to see a heart-shaped pendant with pink, white, and orange stripes. Lydia leaned her head against her father’s chest, “Aw dad thank you so much! I love it!”

“I know you have a lot of the rainbow pride things, and I wasn’t sure if you had any of the lesbian pride flag.” He blushed, “I know there’s a lot of controversy over the flag so I hope I got the right one.”

“It’s perfect dad, I love it.” She hugged him tightly extremely proud of the progress he’s made when it came to her identity. He was always accepting, he never once wavered in his love for her but he had gaps of knowledge when it came to it, but instead of remaining ignorant he was constantly learning and working to support his daughter. She teased him a lot but he really did try very hard to be a good father, and she appreciated everything. She must have been looking at the necklace for too long because her father was eagerly pushing the larger box towards her, she opened it up and was stunned to see the camera she had been begging for all year but her father swore he wasn’t going to be able to get because it was out of stock. She hung the strap around her neck and started taking pictures of everything going on throughout the rest of Christmas morning. Adam got her a set of new tea flavors that she had been wanting to try, Delia got her sweaters for her cats that Lydia instantly put them in and threw a mini photoshoot, and finally Beeteljucie tossed her a present wrapped only in tissue paper and scotch tape. She carefully unwrapped and laughed when she saw he got her “Cards Against Humanity” and fuzzy cat socks. He pretended not to smile when Lydia thanked him announcing he knew all along what to get her because he’s just that intuned to her interests, but secretly he was relieved she liked it. He spent hours trying to figure out what to get his best friend. 

Lydia excitedly gave her presents to everyone: a new paint set for Barbara, a set of crystals for Delia, a model train starter kit for Adam, and a DNA kit for her father because he always talked about wanting to know about where he came from. They were all very thankful and they all lounged around in the torn-up wrapping paper while enjoying each other’s company. Lydia bit back a grimace when her father suggested a gingerbread house decorating contest, but seeing how excited everyone else got she couldn’t bring herself to say no. For the next two hours they kitchen turned from clean to a frosting, sprinkles, and gumdrop disastrous mess. In the end, Lydia’s house came in second just behind Delia’s who shockingly had a very impressive house. Lydia had never known how good her stepmother was at design, while her and her father had decorated the house it was always too outlandish for Lydia’s taste. The gingerbread house looked perfect though, the cookie ceiling had frosting icicle. It broke Lydia’s heart that Beetlejuice started eating it before she got a good photo of it. 

She had been doing a good job of distracting herself, any time she caught herself slipping in her happy facade she threw herself into another mindnumbing task knowing it would keep her mind occupied until Wendy arrived. She was midway cutting up the potatoes for the side dish when there was a knocking at the door. Lydia quickly brushed her hands clean on a dish towel next to her and ran over to the door, almost slipping on the hardwood. She straightened up her red and green Santa hat and opened up the door. Wendy smiled warmly and Lydia pulled her in for a welcoming hug. Charles and Delia greeted Wendy as they walked into the kitchen, Barbara and Adam hugged her, and Beetlejuice shot her finger guns from the distance saying, “Happy holidays Weslie.”

“At least he’s getting closer,” Wendy whispered to Lydia

She simply rolled her eyes, “He knows your name he’s just trying to be a prick and pretend that he doesn’t care about my life. Honestly, the funny part is hearing what W name he’s going to use next to describe you, there’s only so many.”

“Last week I heard him call me Walter when we were talking on the phone.” 

“Yeah that’s just BJ.”

The dinner went smoothly, Lydia felt bad that the traditional Christmas dinner was ham and Wendy couldn’t have it, but they did make a small turkey for her to eat. Once dinner was over they cleaned up the dishes and had a monstrous amount of cookies for dessert. Lydia didn’t realize how into baking Barbara was until the kitchen tables and counters were covered with what must have been hundreds if not a thousand cookies. They were all starting to get stuffed and tired from the long day, everyone was relaxing on the couch, Lydia and Wendy trying to hide the fact that they were holding hands underneath the blankets when Beetlejuice began to loudly and incorrectly sing Christmas carols. The snow was peacefully falling outside the window, making the evening almost as cheesy as a Christmas card. Everything looked so perfect, and Lydia tried to hard to push away the uncomfortableness she felt brewing within her. She wanted so desperately to be happy, to just feel happy, she should be happy. Everyone around her looks so happy, she is surrounded by family, and friends, and loved ones. She thought this should be enough, she should be satisfied. She halfheartedly laughed whenever BJ started screeching the wrong words to “Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer” and smiled when he pulled up Wendy from the couch to dance with him and the Maitlands. 

After preparing a large plate of cookies and other goodies for Wendy to take home to her family in exchange for the delicious Hanukkah treats they sent with Lydia the two girls were left alone to say goodbye for the night. It was almost the exact same as it was three nights ago when they were celebrating Hanukkah but this time it was Wendy handing Lydia a small wrapped gift. Opening it carefully she smiled gratefully when she opened another small jewelry box to find a bracelet with charms on it signifying inside jokes they had. They spent a good five minutes just reminiscing in their jokes, Lydia’s personal favorite the serotonin molecule from when she was hanging out at Wendy’s house and said she could really go for some serotonin and Wendy went up to go look for some, forgetting what it actually was. Lydia pulled her girlfriend into a loving hug, leaning her head on the crook between Wendy’s neck and shoulder. 

“Get a room.” Beetlejuice teased, leaning against the doorway, “Ya know doing this kind of stuff in front of your ex-husband isn’t very becoming Lydia. I just want you to know I’m not the jealous type, I don’t care what you do with Winston-”

“Wendy,” Lydia corrected sarcastically, “One, I’m literally a lesbian. Two you died so technically you’re not my ex-husband I’m your widow. And third, that wedding was a green card thing and YOU KNOW IT!”

Beetlejuice raised his hands up defensively, “I’m joking, I’m joking! You gotta relax kid, I have literally never been interested in you. I’m more interested in Sexy and Babs.”

“Then PLEASE go bother the Maitlands.” Lydia pleaded as she held onto Wendy’s hand while trying to give Beetlejuice a look explaining that she’s trying to have a moment and he’s ruining it. He supposedly got the hint because he went to turn around but not before snapping his fingers and pointing upwards above Lydia and Wendy’s head.

“Looks like mistletoe to me Scarecrow.”

Lydia glanced up and her face tinted pink when she saw the green and red plant hanging above their heads. Wendy snickered, her nose scrunching up like a bunny which Lydia thought was incredibly adorable. She started t stutter out some excuse that they didn’t have to do it, and that Beetlejuice was being an annoying brother figure again, and that mistletoe was stupid in the first place but Wendy was having none of that. She leaned down and gave her a soft kiss on the lips before hugging her goodbye once more and running out to her parents’ car. Lydia stood there with a dumb-happy grin on her face for a solid minute before Beetlejuice reappeared in the room making kissy noises at her. She threw the closest thing within grabbing distance, which unfortunately happened to be one of Delia’s strange rocks. Beetlejuice simply caught it and tossed it around in his hands before telling Lydia to not be so easy to pick on so he doesn’t have to keep bugging her. She rolled her eyes at him again as she walked back into the living room. For the rest of the evening, they sat and watched cheesy Christmas movies and drank hot chocolate, deciding that a new tradition they would adopt would be to guess how much liquor BJ put in the eggnog. Charles took one sip and instantly spit it out it burned of alcohol so much. Beetlejuice tried to sneak some spiked eggnog to Lydia but was stopped almost instantly as literally everyone was watching him and even Lydia refused the absurdly strong drink. 

Everyone had gone to bed around eleven at night, and Beetlejuice went...whereever it is Beetlejuice goes when nobody else is around. Lydia was about to head up to her bedroom and edit some of the photos she had taken in order to keep herself distracted from the growing pit of dread in her stomach. She wished everyone a Merry Christmas and was about to go into her room when her father pulled her aside and gestured for her to follow him into his room. She sat down on his one chair while he went to grab something from the closet. He returned with a nicely done gift bag, stuffed with white and glittery tissue paper and the two handles tied up in a neat bow. 

“Dad you already got me more than everything I wanted, you really didn’t have to.” She smiled sweetly

He fiddled with his hands, taking in a deep breath, “This isn’t from me.”

“Who’s it from?” 

“Your mother. She bought it for you last year before...I don’t know what it is. Remember all those Christmas mornings when I’d have no clue what she got you?” He handed her a card that came with the gift and Lydia stared down shocked to see her mother’s familiar scrawl on the envelope. She always looped her Ls weird, something Lydia had copied into writing her own name, but seeing it again, writing that came from a pen that her mother had held...it was resurfacing all the feelings she had been trying so hard to keep pushed down just for today. She kept repeating to herself in her mind that she was fine, she was okay, her mom was gone, there was nothing she could do about it, don’t cry it’s Christmas, don’t ruin everyone else’s good time, don’t don’t don’t.

She curled her fists into her hair, almost dropping the gift bag onto the floor. Charles pulled Lydia into a hug and everything she had been holding in came flooding out. She started sobbing against her father’s chest, her tiny body shaking with such violence that Charles gripped onto her tighter in an attempt to calm her. She wanted to stop, she wanted to stop crying and just go back to how it had been during the day but she couldn’t help herself. She missed her mother. She missed her mother so much, and it wasn’t fair that she couldn’t see her again. She’d never have another Christmas, or New Years, or Halloween with her. Never. She knew she was soaking her father’s shirt with her tears but he didn’t move away, he just stroked her hair, and told it that it was okay. 

“It’s not okay dad. It’s not okay, it’s not ever going to be okay. She’s dead, she’s never coming back, and this is the last present she ever got me. I tried really hard, I tried really hard to be okay today. Everyone else is so fucking happy and I didn’t want to ruin it for everyone else. I screwed it all up, I’m ruining your day, you tried to do this really nice and sweet thing for me and I’m a goddamn mess!” She gasped out between her hiccuping-sobs 

“Lydia, Lydia sweetheart it’s okay! You’re not ruining anybody’s Christmas. I’m so sorry you felt like you had to keep this all from us because you thought it would upset us. Honey, I’ve been missing her a lot today too. I was holed up in my office all last night flipping through old photo albums of our Christmases wishing we had gotten just one more. That’s when I remembered this present. I packed it away last year, I thought it would be too hard for you back then but I shouldn’t have hidden it from you.”

Lydia sniffled a little, still clutching the present in her hands unsure if she was ready to see what was inside. Lydia set the present down gently on the floor, grabbed her father’s hand and slumped down on his bed. She knew she was getting too big for this, but she really just wanted to be close to someone right now. He laid on his back and she rested her head on his stomach while he gently rubbed the back of her shirt. She was still crying, “I feel so broken. It’s supposed to be the happiest time of the year and the whole month I’ve been a trainwreck with one crisis after another”

“It’s okay for it to not be “the most wonderful time of the year.” a lot of people have struggles around Christmas and this is going to be one of yours. I wish it didn’t have to be, I want so badly for her to still be here with you but we can’t rewind the clock. You don’t have to pretend you’re alright though, it is okay for you to be sad, for you to miss her. We can talk about her, we can still keep her alive in our traditions and everything else.”

She nodded her head, “I know it probably sounds stupid but I got her a present, I know she can’t open it but I got it for her because I couldn’t bring myself not to.”

“It’s not stupid at all honey. It’s incredibly sweet, you should have put in under the tree this morning.”

“Why? There’s nobody to open it.”

“I think it would have made you feel a lot better,” he tried to explain, “I think you would have not been holding all this in all day.”

Lydia thought about it, wondering if all of this could have been avoided if she just talked about it. She was always on her dad’s case for never wanting to talk about things but here she was hiding her feelings from her family. She did it all the time, now that she thought about it. Ever since she moved to Connecticut she had been so preoccupied trying to not ruin the happiness everyone was supposedly experiencing that she just buried down her own problems, only talking about them when they boiled over and she had a breakdown. She laid with her father in a peaceful silence for a few minutes before she sat up and crawled over to where the present was laying. She debated opening it alone but she knew whatever it was it was going to make her cry, she didn’t want to be alone anymore. 

She undid the ribbon and slowly removed the tissue paper. She held the gift in her hands, mesmerized by the object in her hands. It was a snowglobe. When she first pulled it out of the bag she was kind of confused, she had never collected snowglobes but when she turned it around she saw that inside the glass was two photographs of their family. One when Lydia was just a baby, the other a photo they had taken just a few weeks before Emily had died. She grazed her thumb over the glass and showed it to her father who smiled bittersweetly at the gift. She noticed there was a turn-key on the bottom and when she wound it up she couldn’t help but smile when it started to play that song her mother always sang when they were cleaning up. It was strange to hear “Jump in the Line” in a music box tune. She knew there were tears in her eyes but they weren’t as urgent feeling as the ones from just a few minutes ago. It felt alright to cry, she wasn’t exactly sad but she wasn’t happy. It was strange. 

She and her father sat on the bed listening to the snowglobe play it’s tune over and over again while looking at old photos from Christmas’s of long ago and not so long ago. Her dad must have texted Delia because she never came into the bedroom that night, she felt bad about it especially because she was fifteen years old now, she shouldn’t need to fall asleep in her daddy’s room but he assured her that Delia completely understood. She snuggled under his blankets, he kissed her goodnight on her forehead. It did not take long for her dad to fall asleep, his loud snoring quickly filling the room but Lydia didn’t mind. For the first time all day she didn’t have this crippling tension building up in her body, she was relaxed and she knew that her father was right. It was okay if it wasn’t the most wonderful time of the year.


End file.
